Before we married I wore makeup and perfume. I wouldn't go out without my make up. I don't wear a boatload but I love my eyeliner and lipgloss. Well needless to say he didn't like perfume so I had to 100% stop wearing anything with smell. No lotion, hair products or perfume. I wanted some perfume so bad but I knew his "allergies" which were not allergies but I just let it go not a big deal. But also he started complaining about makeup how he didn't find it attractive. So I cut back. Not a big deal. But inside I really liked those things. But I didn't complain because it made him happy...or at least I thought it made him happy. If he was happy he wouldn't have left. So now I wear my eyeliner and lipgloss and put perfume on in the mornings before work and I feel really good!
I burned candles all the time before we got married and when we got married the smelly ones had to stop so I just stopped burning them. Now that is one of the first things I do when I go home is light my candle on the coffee table.
I like nice classy clothing. Wrap around shirts and things that look professional but classy and on the weekends I love my jeans and purple hightops or black boots. But he loved young girls with thongs hanging out of their jeans. To me that looked slutty and I don't like it, I didn't like a black bra under a white t-shirt, I am 39 not 19, so he slowly began to hate what I wore. Which in turn made me not like what I wore. Between that and the weight I was misserable in clothing. And my breasts grew to a DD and he HATES HATES HATES breasts. So yet again...try and hide them wear baggy shirts. He never touched them and only made negative comments about them. Now he is gone I love them! I buy cool bras for them and really think they look nice with my weight loss and height. I dont' try and cover them up and hide them. I don't show them either but tasteful shirts look really nice.
I don't know if these are changes that count though? Maybe I am moving in the wrong direction?? I physically and mentally with my looks and apartment feel a million times better but I really miss him in my heart and I can't change that. Only so many candles you can burn and new clothing to buy.
