Quote: What does he want? I think he wants to be loved unconditionally, to exist in peace, to be understood, to be heard, to be appreciated, to be loved, to be needed, to be important, to not be immersed in conflict, to be admired, to be successful. What else? Can I give him those things? Can I do it in the face of all of my fear and anxiety?
Your H is the only one who can give himself the confidence to "feel" these things, Sage. I can't imagine that you are not "showing" him this already.
I just started an interesting book (the title/author escapes me). The premise of this book states that each time a couple has a significant conflict, it gives them the opportunity to either grow or become more entrenched in their "habits." For the folks on this BB, I believe we have recognized something in ourselves, and have grown. Most of our Ses have yet to do this. Some already have. Perhaps your H is in the process of evolving... Let's face it, our Ses have some catching up to do, and unless we back off a bit, we'll always be one step ahead...
We seem to be in a simliar spot these days, Sage. I think, for me, I am projecting expectations on my W of what I want, but she is not yet ready to give. Do you think you might be doing the same?
