Serial EA/PA WAW/MLC

[BradNL]

But to cut a long post short Room-mates for the sake of children does work. It will be painful initially, but it will get better. Only if you can truly detach emotionally from what is happening to her. And do not snoop or take any interest in what your W is doing, as that will always hurt you the most.

It will buy you enough time to consolidate your life, and will put you in a position to either reconcile with your W (given time) or finally move on without W. I think it will be win-win on your part and the kid(s).

Also, my XW and I agreed not to bring any of our partners (mainly her OM) or future partners into our "family" home, out of respect for each other.

Yeah, all of us learn the hard way about snooping... Whenever I feel the urge to snoop I just remind myself that knowing won't make me feel better, so I don't.

I've been in this sitch for 7 months now, the last month or two I have gained some peace with it. My doctor, therapist and friends all keep telling me that they can't understand how I can be so calm with everything that W is doing... I just know that I have to accept that I can't change her mind, only can change myself and I am happy with the my changes so far and hopefully will keep going along this path.

Already laid down that boundary, any outside people are not allowed around our kids/home while we are still living together. There are lots of things that I have learned to accept, but that will not be one of them.

Thanks for stopping by, hope your W turns around and sees that there is more strength in coming back than listening to her ego.

Brad