I agree with some of what Sandi and Kerry have said about LRT, but I'd like to add a cautionary note....DON'T overdo it. I'm sure you're impatient, who wouldn't be, but don't swing too far the other way.
I, like you, spend quite a bit of time with my wife after separation and still spent time with her after divorce. It would go in cycles...I'd spend more and more time with her, get impatient, want more, pursue too much, get rebuffed, and then start over from a place of more distance. It was frustrating. And I think in retrospect, the times she did more initiating and talking about us possibly trying again related more to the status of the other relationship than to what I was doing. But I do know that when I went too dark or too mysterious or got too busy to spend any time with her, it usually resulted in negatives, including claims that it validated that I didn't care for her. Yes, you could argue it was just a way of making me show my hand and also trying to draw me back in, but then again, why did she go ahead and divorce me if she wanted to keep me dangling?
Yes, you should maybe refresh your memory on the book, but use the whole book, don't just focus on LRT. Rule#1 and the only one that really matters is: DO WHAT WORKS. You should be getting a little more "me time" to recharge your batteries and do self-care, but just walk the fine line where your actions result in positives (ie she misses you, wants you around more, is impressed with what you are doing, etc) without introducing negatives (ie he doesn't care about me, I guess I was right that he couldn't continue to be attentive to me, etc).
The bottom line Brit is that you are getting impatient. You want to see something more positive occurring. The truth is, it isn't going to happen until she's ready for it. Would suddenly giving her a dose of what divorce would mean jog her to chase you? Maybe. But I'd argue she still might not be ready for what it really takes. What needs to happen, and who knows how long that will be, is for this longing for OM to end. You know that the, "I took him off of my IM and myspace", is nothing more than junior high antics. She's temporarily mad at him. She wouldn't even need to mention it or talk down about him if she didn't still have feelings. My XW didn't come back until the thing with the OP ended so she could at least look at me. Your wife is barely looking at you now. Work on your changes. Work on making your life as good as possible (p.s. why don't you decide your own house colors and do your own home improvements). Be a great guy. When this little infatuation ends, she'll finally see you and then she'll chase.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
