Questions.. I hope someone can give me feedback/thoughts..
So, I was thinking about myH's trip coming up soon. According to him, she is paying for it and he is broke so I can believe that. If he is going to her home/hometown, I believe he is going to see her family (mom, sick dad, and whoever...) I don't have confirm yet and there is no way to get the truth.
Do I let it happen...?
I went to Oprah.com and was reading information about a topic " I am the other woman" (anybody seen it? I think it was on Oct, last year) It gave me insight of 'other woman thoughts'.. and there is one woman said she believed everything what the married man said about his family, his wife, his life of other side... Of course, he is a lier and why he would not lie to her?
My H may be saying to OW like
-divorce is coming soon (truth... NO! because we don't have money) -i do not see my wife anymore (.. we see everyday) -my wife was terrible woman for last 7 years (.. I am independent, good mother, caring, good person for him, his family, my family and society .. according to me :)) -she said she is going back to her country (... if it is the right thing to do in the future. Until then, I will fight for myself and kids!) -she does not care about me and OW's relationship any more (.. I care about him soo much and still love him and it hurts me every moment since the A started) -she moved on and she does not contact me at all (..HELL NO, I am still here and trying to figure out!!) -my kids seem happy because I am happy (.. D7 has separation anxiety, she is in therapy, she cries alot and she worried SO MUCH, and S2 is not a same little guy any more) -i think my family will love you once they get to know you (...that will be mystery in the future but they offer me and kids to live with them so.. not anytime soon) -i love to your family (.. I think it could be true because their A (or R) becomes reality if other people involve.. Right now their R is still fantasy, sin.. you know). -I will not leave you forever (... Oh, Honey, if she finds out many things you have done (lies, cheating on her with your wife, give her great speech how her life will be wonderful) I am not sure if she will look at you the same.
just needed to vent.. thank you.. Beauty
Me:31 H:29 D:7 S:2 M:7y Together:8y found out his A :07/07 bomb:11/01/07 s: 11/15/07 OW-1 is out of state; other female friends around first thread
I don't want to let him go to the trip. but there is nothing I can do. powerless and hopeless... My in-laws asked me what I want for my birthday... I don't want anything.. just stop the pain..
Another vent time...
Me:31 H:29 D:7 S:2 M:7y Together:8y found out his A :07/07 bomb:11/01/07 s: 11/15/07 OW-1 is out of state; other female friends around first thread
Hey beauty, just thinking of you. You are right, there is nothing you can do, but you aren't powerless or hopeless. I know it feels that way (to me too!), but you can do something wonderful for yourself and your kids while he is gone. Enjoy your time.
I have not seen the info on Oprah about the OW. I guess sometimes it IS true that they don't know the real sitch of the person they're having an A with. But sometimes they DO know. The OW in my sitch knew.
I hear your anger and your pain. Definitely make plans. Don't sit with idle thumbs while he is gone (not that you can do what with small kids).
Yup Yup, finally the day came. The past year, all I did was struggles and getting through day by day. I hope this year will be the better than this year As of now, my H is planning to go to dinner with me and kids tonight. He asked me if I wanna go to Pizza Hut...
WTF???, he is lost completely. Why do I want to go there for my birthday?? I made sure he got the message "BETTER PLACE."
I was very emotional past one week or so but I am detaching well today and doing good so far.
Beauty
Me:31 H:29 D:7 S:2 M:7y Together:8y found out his A :07/07 bomb:11/01/07 s: 11/15/07 OW-1 is out of state; other female friends around first thread
Joie and NoCode Thank you for B-day wish. Well, I thought my b-day will be better than expected. At last minute, my H said he is sick so I kindly offer to have kids with me for the night (usually Tuesday is his night) and told him it is okay to have the dinner other time. He really did sound seriously sick. He told me 'thank you'. Two hours later he called and sounded fine. He said he HAS TO go to finish assignments and is going to campus.
Before kids bed time, I called him back twice and text him that kids want to say good night and D7 is sad she didn't go to dinner together. If he is just doing assignemnt, he usually call back and say good night. So, I am pretty sure he is not in a place that he can not say 'good night' to kids.
As of now, he has not called back and I am pretty sure he is not home and probably drinking somewhere or visiting someone. Kids are used to him not calling back so they just went to bed (well, D7 said 'if he is sick, I don't know why he is busy and cannot call me..')
It is BS but I am not going to let him ruin my b-day. I am greatful I spent time with kids and saw thier smails before they went to bed.
Beauty, 31 years old and will have better year than last year!!
Last edited by BEAUTYandWAH; 02/20/0804:48 AM.
Me:31 H:29 D:7 S:2 M:7y Together:8y found out his A :07/07 bomb:11/01/07 s: 11/15/07 OW-1 is out of state; other female friends around first thread
As of now, my H is planning to go to dinner with me and kids tonight. He asked me if I wanna go to Pizza Hut...