Dar, his emotions are a bit of a train wreck, day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute, even. But it seems to me, that for him, you are still a trigger for negative emotions. Not all the time, but it seems to be a pattern. So, for now, keeping contact minimized seems to me to be a good idea. I think you can respond to him, if there are things of substance to respond to, otherwise, keep quiet. Let him start the contact, as he is ready.
There are a lot of people besides you that struggle with this dar, even people that are (hopefully) succeeding. Do your best every day. Try to do a little better every day. When you slip, try to understand what happened, then put it behing you, and get going again. You can do it!
