They rationalise because it makes them feel better about the choices they are making. Nobody could deal with the amount of pain they are inflicting on their children without some kind of "rational" reason why everything would be better afterwards.
I feel the only conflict they have is with the consequences, not with wanting to stay or go. Both choices, to them, are full of pain and "hard issues", leave and take the huge hit to finances and stability or stay and keep feeling that they are trapped...
In my sitch I, like everyone here, wish my W would wake up and see that there are other choices, but she is so determined to leave that she will accept a dramatic chance in living standards and the damage it will do to our children to get out.
Accept that they are not rational, but rationalise everything they do. To them we are the ones who are being irrational because its obvious to them that their choices are right, why can't we see?
Stay strong Frank.
Brad
Me: 35 W: 34 S8 & S5 M: 11 IDLY: 08/2007
"Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose" - Janis Joplin, Me and Bobby McGee
"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about dancing in the rain!"
