Yes, I think snooping is invasion of privacy, but if they are cheating than it is violating your marriage vows and that trumps the invasion of privacy. I doubt there is a LBS who has never snooped, including me.
My H started hiding everything when I found out about the and started snooping. He changed passwords to his phones and his email. He didn't like me snooping. I told him if he had nothing to hide, he wouldn't be doing such things.
Honesty and trust are vital to the success of a marriage. If a WAS have nothing to hide, then they wouldn't care. If you didn't have your suspicions, you wouldn't want to snoop. But you do have your suspicions, and he is crying foul play at you for snooping, that indicates to me that he is hiding something.
If your H is breaking the sanctity of marriage, breaking the vowels that you took, etc., you have the right to know.
But, like NikB said, I think the is the least of your worries! I think he is a ticking time bomb. You definitely need to get away from him. You said you had no family, what about friends? If there are no shelters in your area, try to call an abuse hotline.
There are lots of localized groups, this is a national group: 1-800-799-SAFE - National Domestic Violence Hotline (this is a US group).
I would stop snooping. You don't want to push him over the edge. Be more worried about your safety and your kids -- that is more important than his A. He doesn't matter. Your safety and welfare is!
