FLTC: FROM IRAQ

[Dom R]

In my civilian job, I am a high school administrator. I have absolutely no issue taking on out of control parents, never lose my composure, never blink an eye, and can deliver "ornance on target" with EVERY encounter.
...
Now, this is the same FLTC who does the avoidance technique not to discuss anything with W. Emotional involvment clouds everything, and I, like many of you need to apply my officer/administrator filter to talking with W. I have to stop believing that each encounter is the proverbial "STRAW"

WHY THE HEl* IS THIS??!?!?!?!?

wow.. well, you're lucky, then. at least you possess the verbal skills. now you just need to find out where your "gear shifter" is


Maybe it's an issue of context. parents talk about kids, and school. You probably have built up certain speech patterns that work, when talking about (other peoples') kids, and school.

YOU came up with those patterns. YOU can figure out things that work. So now all you need to do, is work out a new set of patterns that work, but in the context of [money/your kids/....]

LIke AG said... you have the additional issue, that what your W says, affects your life.
If you could "detach" for a moment, and pretend that a conversation with your wife, was like a conversation with a parent -- that is, important, but if you screw it up, it wont be a total disaster for "your life" --- figure out what you might say differently then. That might help you think of different ways to talk to her, that are more useful.