on hold

[stella_k]

thanks Addie,

I have my methods, of course, and I can cope but I'm so painstakingly slow...
Which is why I never participate in chats - by the time I have my answer, all the people are gone or the topic has changed:)

Yes, for me it is also the second move, and it was my H who initiated it. I can adapt
easily and both times I was content with what we had, but my H always felt like
he had to keep going. I have friends here, but not close friends. We live on campus
where everyone knows everyone else and I feel uncomfortable sharing my problem with any of my colleages/friends.

I am also trying to keep my D17 out of it.
She doesn't have a clue (I hope she doesn't!) and I feel safe knowing that there is
nobody here to tell her. I am really worried about her IB exams and don't want her
to get heartbroken over her dad when she has to concentrate on her studies.

As for myself, sometimes I feel the urge to spill it out, but since I've found the DB, it's getting better. Yes, venting helps. It also helps to be among people who know
better then telling me to get out of the M and forget about my H.

It is as if the sitch doesn't exist for as long as I can keep it for myself...

Even though I'm determined to go home, I'm still taking sabbatical (!), so that I can
have a back up. I am comfortable here and they want to keep me , so I think I can have it easily.

After so many years I'm a little bit afraid of going home and haunted by thousands of "what if"s. My security is gone along with my H.

I think you are right about your H been in MLC. Keep reading the MLC threads,
we have to know more about the aliens:)

Thanks for checking in on me.