Reclaiming myself and my life, part 2

[Bworl]

I know you're down and defeated right now Frank. Tomorrow you won't feel quite so resigned to the final outcome. Right now your mode is to believe all the things she's said, even though you know what a mistake that is. Right now your mode is to agree with her that you have no future together, even though you know that's not right too.


Everyone has gone through this. Usually right after a seemingly rational heart to heart with our WAS.


It happens because we allow their relative exterior sanity to make us believe that they really are speaking the truth. Their version of events are so incriminating, and we've gotten so little feedback from them in the past, our hungry heart and mind takes it all in and gives it a credibility that, in our right minds, we would know it does not deserve.


Frank is NOT a quitter. But Frank IS pretty whupped right now.


I've asked you twice already about some time away for Frank. I'm talking REAL time away. Rest, relaxation (whatever that means for you Frank), and peace and quiet. You need to recharge, find your center a bit again.


You're not the cause of all the problems in your relationship.

And most importantly...


YOU DID NOT QUIT when the going got tough, SHE DID.


And she's right back in that quitting mode again.


So let her quit Frank. Doesn't mean you have to buy her load of half-truths and over emphasized faults. Let her quit.


What do we know about spouses who go MLC on us?

1. You're not the problem, they are.
2. You can't solve their problems, only they (and God) can.
3. Nothing you do is likely to help.
4. Some things you do CAN hurt.
5. They need their space and eventually you learn that YOU need them to have their space too.


One last time, so I'm sure you've read it and understand my message...

This is not the end. And you do NOT have to be lost. If I had posted this thread TO YOU, you would know JUST what to tell me to do. Think about it.

Blessings,

Bill