Wandering Poster is Counting Down

[Dom R]

Going back aaaaall the way to the top...

.... But this time, I turned an overhead on then, as well. On my second trip, I found W in there, no problem. She said, don't turn their closet lights on. I said ok. Then she lectured me on the wasted of money, electricity, and environmental impact of having those two compact fluorescent bulbs on for a half hour or maybe forty five minutes. I am sure I rolled my eyes and shook my head, as I walked away. Ooops! So she said, why can't we discuss this, I said you made your point. She said I never acknowledged that she was right. I didn't realize it right then, I should have said "the reason there isn't any point in discussing anything with you is that he only acceptable end is me telling you that you are right!"

Jeff... instead of resenting her, and fighting her... why didnt you acknowlege what she was saying with her long lecture? It was obviously important to her, if she spoke to you about it for that long.
And worse yet, when she *engaged* with you, and actually *told you* what was bothering her... why didnt you do so then?

You could have just said (again?) "yes, you are right. It is wasteful to leave on lights, when I am not using them".
You chose not to.

Some people just "have to be right", whether they are factually right or not.
Your wife was not demonstrating that negative behaviour, even though you imply it in your rant.

What she was saying may have been trivial... but it was also factually "right". You disrespected her on multiple levels by not acknowledging this.
(even if she was "wrong" in your view, you should have shown respect for her. But she was right!! )

Sounds like what she may have been wanting for a long time, isnt valentine's day gifts, but personal validation for her opinions, and viewpoints. you havent been giving it to her.

Maybe you could focus on doing that for a few months, and see what happens, before throwing in the towel on your marriage.