I always enjoy your posts Cobra. I think you are probably going down the right path with that last post to MJ.
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Still don’t think you have issues to settle with this man? Maybe not him per se, but with men in general, your exH being the poor example that you had to get stuck with as representative of males. But then, you had as much choice in selecting him as he. So why are you SOOOO angry about him???? Can’t you see that the same issues that make you mad toward your exH are basically the same issues that get you upset with these other men? Great sex with them or poor sex with your exH have NOTHING to do with it.
I think you are way to fragile right now to be even considering a R MJ. None of your problems are these other men. They are just complicating your own issues. You are angry at yourself and clearly have major self-esteem issues. I really think you should take some time away from Match and wherever else you are meeting these men and just learn to like yourself. Sounds cheesy but in the long-run, I think you will be better off.
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Why in the world, with all the discussion that has gone on this board and all the reading you have done, do you still base your sense of self on the acceptance or rejection of your sexuality by men?
I'll ditto that. And trust me, I'm not very different than you MJ. I have had my share of being way too overtly sexual and it almost always backfires. And that's even with my own H sometimes. In a new R?! Forget it. I don't think you are taking the right approach here. The "freak" comments are being said by All of these men for a reason MJ. And I've been called a freak myself. It not a compliment, as much as I want to take it that way.
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The more you try to get men to like you sexually, the more they will disrespect you. You have trapped yourself into your own negative self-reinforcing cycle, one that can be very destructive and to which I can see no positive solution.
This is a good point. Leading with your sexuality is Not a very smart thing for a woman to do. Whether that is right or wrong is not the issue. That is reality. Men will not respect it. Period.
You've got plenty of other strengths MJ (as do I). You don't need to parade your sexuality around for all the world to see. You are smart, funny....just a nice person. Go with that for a while and see what happens.
