Well, Valentine's Day is over and with it my hope that H is not buying jewelry for "someone else". The receipt stated that it was a gold heart pendant. He got me piece of jewelry, but it was a bracelet, with little gold hearts on it. So, I am pretty darn sure the store didn't mix it up that much, not when the other two pieces of jewekry on the receipt were exactly as described on it.
I got somewhat withdrawn after we exchanged gifts, he didn't even get me flowers this time, and is the first Valentine's Day he didn't get me flowers in over twenty years. Our S asked him if he got me flowers and he said no. Then this morning he said something to me about flowers, and I said wow, it is the first time you didn't get them for me, and he said the stores were too crowded and he didn't want to go into one of them. I said jokingly he could have called the florist, and he said you know why I won't do that. I said I couldn't believe he was going to punish me for the rest of my life for an incident that happened twenty-three years ago. I mean if a florist delivers flowers that start to fall apart the next day, wouldn't anyone say something? And wouldn't any other H even notice?? He told me he wasn't PUNISHING me, he just felt almost as though he was the victim of a crime, because a friend of his at work had recommended the florist to him, and I apparently told him to tell the friend the florist sucked. I am sorry, hurts that he has done to me over the years, I don't dredge up to throw at him like that. Like after our S was born, all the other mothers had beautiful arrangements on their doors, but not me, and my H didn't even send me flowers or even go buy some to bring me. My mother noticed that my door was the only one without any decoration, and took it upon herself to put a decoration on it. I asked him if he had been punishing me even at that time. I decided to ask him about that, even though it is the FIRST time I have said anything about it after fifteen years. He holds everythng against me that I have ever done. He also said he was very thoughtful about what he gets me as a gift, and he wasn't sure I even appreciated it.
Today while he was at work, I was trying to get him on his cell. He would never answer. I needed to ask about what time he wanted to go out for dinner tonight So, I called *67 and the secret cell number and after a few rings, it went to answer, a generic answer. So, after a couple of hours, I tried my H again, and still no answer, I called the secret cell again, and this time I FORGOT to *67 it first!!! OOPS!!! No answer, anyway, but now H knows I know he still has it. When he finally answered his phone, he apparently had not yet looked at the secret one to see who had called him.
Anyway, I went shopping for something new to wear, and the whole while I was thinking that Yeah, I hope he does say something about it, because that will let him know I AM NOT AS BIG A FOOL AS HE THINKS!!!
So, I am wondering how to broach the subject of the receipt. I am thinking of in a few day, saying that I found it just that day while gathering up cleaning or something. And did he need that receipt for anything. And that sorry I saw the price he paid for my jewelry. and that there was another piece on it that I was curious about. Just to see how nervous he will get and what sort of lie he will dream up.
I know this is a long post, but crap!!! I am so tired of all this garbage, and I know I am standing for my M, but it seems like the ow is also standing and waiting for my H. stupid, stupid cow!! I need to go and pray for the Lord to guide me in how to handle this.
cat and jak, I hope you had a great Valentine's day. Mine would have been great otherwise. I think I need to give my H the five LL to read, I don't think he understands anymore than he says I do about our R. Although, he did say he didn't think he had EVER done anything wrong in our marriage, but all the wrong was done to him, by me.
Sorry for all the ranting, but I don't have anyone else, and don't want to burden our S with all this mess.
