One thing that 'throws' me is when W is calm and isn't irrational, just talks about things like it's just 'business'.
In our 'current' arrangement which was pre 'divorce' plans she's supposed to pay the health insurance as 'her part' of the house bills. It was a month behind in January and she had asked me to pay it because she didn't have enough money. I couldn't because of, well, she screwed my head up and I needed time to recover and earn some $$$$. Since January she's used the house account (my money) to pay for groceries (her responsibility also) and other things.
Well, she had to pay 2 months insurance and she JUST got paid so now she's broke again.
She got a price change by raising the deductible, and had decided that she didn't want to pay so much so she might drop herself from the insurance and go to the free clinic. We're talking $150 per month here.
Anything I said to the contrary was responded to with an angry tone.
Yeah, I know I shouldn't read anything into stuff but it makes me think that really knows what she wants (a divorce) and she's working out in her head how she will accomplish it.
I guess that's me being 'hopeful / not hopeful' and I need to stop that. I want to BE hopeful when she's acting weird but then when she's 'rational' it gets me down.
I need to keep reminding myself that she's not good for me. That's hard when I still have feelings.
