She was very negative tonight. Says she cant stay with me. Says her feelings for the OM are strong. She says she is trying on the M by coming home each night. Not willing to do anything else. Says there are things about the OM that I would be really jelous about, but if we are to stand any chance then she cant/shouldnt tell me. She cant see her feelings for him dampening even though she knows she cant have him and she acknowledges the fact that he is of questionable moral character. She said her feelings of guilt are about 30-40% of the reason for leaving, OM is only 10% and the rest is us. Cant believe anything. She said herself that I shouldnt believe anything I tell her. She feels bad about the baby, the fact that we cant be positive about whos it is. That is another reason she couldnt stay, because if it wasnt mine then she would see the OMs face everyday, so couldnt face the guilt of being with me. Her feeling seems to be telling her that the baby is not mine, even though the timing makes it more likely to be mine. She says that we just `had sex` so there was no feeling there, so couldnt have made a baby.
This rollercoaster really sucks. Yesterday even though I was on the up I knew there would be a dip. She brought it up again, need to stop responding. I am very calm about all this still.
Well you know, **** her and **** him, I am going to draw her back and everything will be better than before!! Who will be laughing then!!!
PMA still firmly in place. Just need to stop rising to the bait when she starts talking.
Cheers
Steve
Me 27 W 30 M 2yrs/ T 5yrs Expecting our first child Sept 08 warning bomb (has feelings for someone) 21/12/08 I found out about OM (by snooping) 14/1/08 Living together.
