For a good deal of people who go have affairs... and then their spouse goes and gets a life... the wayward spouse is all the sudden... 'hey, wait a second here...' and the wayward spouse now becomes jealous or mean in regard to Other's behavior.
This is outlined, ver batim, in The Passion Trap.
I'm sure it is one of the prime reasons Michelle urges those reading DB/DR to go GAL.
