Better late than never?

[jon2911]

Hi all,
Things have been steadily progressing here, I thought I might be moving the Piecing soon. Two weeks ago W told her family that we're "in the early stages of working things out", which is huge. We've actually been there for a while, but to tell her family was a big step.

W wanted some space the last couple days, so I've been back staying at my place, but planning our Valentine's camping trip for this weekend. We had several great texts back and forth yesterday, and I had flowers delivered to her, which she loved. Then this morning happened.

7:15 AM, W calls.

W: I just wanted to call you and thank you personally for the flowers. I also wanted to tell you that I can't come this weekend.
Me: Oh, that's OK, not feeling well? (W has to cancel most plans with me or anyone else because her migraines are so bad).
W: No, I just don't think it's a good idea. I hope you'll still go. Talk to you later.

Silence, then hang-up. The words were like ice. I'm sure most of you know what I mean. I got up and drove to work, with the thoughts flooding. What the hell happened? This trip was her idea. Is OM around again? Did her family or friends freak her out? No freakin' explanation? I just felt played. How much longer can I keep trying and making these plans and responding to her every whim? Of course I have no alternate plans for the weekend, everyone thinks I'm going camping with her. I decided to go by myself and probably be miserable. Maybe read more DB and marriage stuff. I thought of 1,000 angry texts to send her, but sent this:

"I'm here if you ever want to talk"

A couple hours later, a call at work. I could tell she'd been crying.

W: I had the most horrible nightmare last night. We were at your house, and you and your dad were yelling, and there were guitars, and Quicken. I woke up and called you right away. I'm just not sure if I can do this anymore.

A little background, W's relationship with my dad has always been a problem, guitars represent my music passion, and Quicken is, um, finances I guess?

I told W that I'm so sorry to hear this and thanked her for the explanation. (Terrible nightmares always accompany her worst migraines, so I've gotten used to it). She doesn't have to be sure about anything right now. I'm still going camping, and she's welcome. She said she'll call me back later today.

This sucks. I'm not putting any pressure on her AT ALL. The pressure she's feeling is life stuff and her migraine disease. Her nightmare shows we still have very deep issues to work through, but she still won’t consider counseling or anything like that. What the hell am I supposed to do? This whole thing really threw me, and the rollercoaster is back again.