Finding my way out of the dark

[mishka422]

My poor son! I felt so awful for him tonight. We had to go to Wal-Mart to pick up some supplies for his project. I've been a mess all day and walking in there was not helpful with all the darned hearts, flowers, balloons, etc everywhere. I bit my lip so hard to keep from crying in front of him that I drew blood. Couldn't hold it back though and started crying right in the middle of the kitchen section. I tried to hide it by looking very intently at a skillet but he knew. I just felt terrible that he saw that.

We got his supplies, picked up dinner (oh yeah, Taco Bell...happy Valentines Day!),and went home. Unfortunately the project only took about 30 minutes to finish. I was hoping for a good couple of hours. Thankfully my friend called and we talked for over an hour. She's been through D and knows the emotions well. Her H was the typical WAS though. He never ever looked back. She reminded me of the look in my H's eyes when he saw me at S13's karate class. He looked like he wanted to devour me right there and complimented me which he NEVER, EVER has done. I guess I can hang on to that look in his eyes and hope that it means he's thinking of me.

MMF - I read Charlyne Cares every day. She and Bob have a fantastic testimony. Bob's perspective this week was so powerful. Have you seen the 15FEB one yet? Isaiah 54:4-7 is my new favorite verse. I printed it out and am going to hang it up by my desk to remind me of God's love and guidance in all things in life and that He will never abandon me.