Happy Valentines Day everyone....I hope today was a special day for you regardless of where everyone is on this ride....hope you took time out for yourselves today!
I haven't posted for awhile....ups and downs galore here!
After 6 months of feeling that H was always out on his bike to get away from me, he surprised me...Last Saturday H bought me a new road bike. We rode 21.7 miles Saturday, 10.3 miles Sunday (before I pooped out...then H went another 8 or 9) and 8.5 on Tuesday after work before dark...it was pretty cold Tuesday! I was really surprised how much I enjoyed it. My new bike is much lighter weight than the mountain bike I'd been riding, so it is much easier to tackle the hills around here on the lighter bike! The only downside is being out in the traffic...which I'm getting used to. We had a really great weekend together...went to church and country dance lessons on Sunday night. Things seemed to be looking up. I feel like this is really great exercise...my muscles haven't been sore, however my behind doesn't like the seat too much!!! I have a few bumps and bruises...I got clip in shoes and peddals and it took me a few falls to figure out how to unclick my shoes before I stopped.
Tuesday night after the bike ride things went downhill. H seemed down and depressed again...stressed about school and work...and MOW...??? I got sucked into the drama and had a setback..we ended up in an argument....sometimes I just can't pull myself away.....hit me with a 2x4.... Anyway by last night things were a bit better...we had dinner out...but then pretty much had the evening to ourselves...doing our own things. H hasn't been cuddling with me this week...which I miss terribly, but I'm giving him his space and not saying anything about it.
I gave him a fairly generic V-D card...something about loving him in good times and bad, sunny or rainy days....he seemed to appreciate it and thanked me....wished me a Happy V Day too. He invited me to lunch and we had Mexican food...yum....conversation seemed strained and his attention was all over the place. I'm sure he's busy trying to figure out when he'll see MOW and what he's going to do for her...???? But whatever happens it is out of my control and I'm trying not to dwell on it. He has class tonight and probably will be gone from 5:30-10:00. I kind of enjoy school night because I have time to do everything I put off when we're together so that I'm ready for whatever he suggests we do that day/night. I should make school nights my ME nights...but haven't taken that step yet.
Both kids are coming home for the weekend so that will be a change from the past month...I'll be glad to see them and hope we all have an enjoyable weekend together. H usually gets stressed out when they are home..doesn't like them making a mess or sitting in front of the TV all the time...they're college kids...that's what they do...but the things H used to not mind seem to really upset him now....we'll all be on eggshells this weekend.
I've missed talking to all of you...I've been keeping up on your threads but I don't always post to them....I'll try to do better, but if you don't hear from me, please know that all of you are in my thoughts and prayers...and I'm out here lurking!
BA
Me:43 H:48 M:24 yrs T: 26 yrs 2 kids ILYNILWYA 8-07 - MOW 9-07 H moved out 8-2-08 Back 8-18-08 Affair continues Back home but not emotionally
