Please help...need MLC advice

[bombardier50]

I was on meds for a while but was having some physical side effects.

So try another one. Keep trying until you find one that you can live with. You need all the help you can get right now.

H's partner was my GP doctor, and he would be happy to still see me for free (H's two partners are disgusted with his behavior) but it would be incredibly awkward to go into the office right now.

Why? Awkward for who? Go.

Since H stopped paying enough to cover the bills, I have to be really careful.

What does your attorney say about this? From the sound of it, you have many, many friends and relatives. Now is when you ask them for help. Asking for help is not beneath your dignity. Do it for your kids. Someday, you will be able to return the favor.

Can't afford counseling sessions.

Do you have a church? Can you talk to your pastor?

I've gone dark when he starts spewing hatred and nastiness, and I've been trying my best to act "As if."

Good. Keep it up. Fake it 'til you make it.

I know I'm a bit of a control freak, and even though I keep turning it over to God, I keep trying to take it back from Him, too.

Drop the rope. Let go. Read my signature quote below.

But it still hurts so much to see our couple friends and know that even though they love me it is awkward for them to be around me.

Have they told you it's awkward for them? I doubt it. What's happened is not a reflection on you. He is making an azz of himself. And I'm willing to bet that everyone can see that. You need all your friends right now.

It hurts a lot on days like today, Valentine's Day...

Happy Valentine's Day, tpaschal. Do something loving for yourself today.

Like I said, kicks-in-the-pants would be appreciated.

I'm going to tell you something that a beautiful soul on this board once told me (saffie):

1. You are a good woman.
2. Because you are a good woman, you are fighting for something you believe in...your marriage.
3. Because you are a good woman, if he throws this away, there are plenty of good men out there who will scoop you up.