A few months ago Mrs. Eddie found her high-school ex-boyfriend on MySpace and contacted him. No big deal, she's been messaging with people of both sexes for quite a while and never let it get out of hand.
She originally broke up with him because they lived a couple of hours apart and never got to see each other. A month after they broke up she wrote him another letter asking him to get back together. She never received a reply.
Soon after finding him on MySpace she finds out, 20 years after the fact, that he sent her several letters that she never received, and it turned out that her grandmother intercepted and destroyed the letters, as she had done to Mrs. Eddie's mom years before.
She also finds out that High School Ex-Boyfriend still has feelings for her and that she still has feelings for HSEB.
The whole thing has since progressed to "cybersex" with webcam performances. He says he's going to move here, but won't say when. She told me that if he does show up, she doesn't think she'll be able to stop herself from sleeping with him.
Meanwhile, she's still as loving and affectionate and sexual with me as ever. Well, except for a period of almost a week when he wasn't in contact with her and she went into a funk and wanted nothing to do with anyone. But, fortunately for both of us, she came back out of it.
My secret is out. When she told me she'd probably end up sleeping with him, I didn't even try to threaten her... she wouldn't have bought it and if she did and something happened anyway, I don't want to give her up. Not because I don't want to be alone (being alone is pretty cool in many ways), but because, as long as she remained emotionally and physically intimate with me, I would still want to be with her.
So how can she carry on without losing her feelings for yours truly? For one thing, I'm figuring it doesn't hurt that I'm not begging her or threatening her or placating her, and while I love being with her, I'm not terrified of losing her. Also, a big part of the pattern seems to be that she'll justify her affair by blaming it on someone else, usually the husband, at which point he becomes the enemy. Mrs. Eddie instead blames her grandmother, who is conveniently dead. Mrs. Eddie's logic is that if her grandmother had allowed them to remain in contact, she'd have either ended up with him or had enough of him and broke up with him for good. She has not rewritten any history with me, said she still loves me, and knows that I did not cause her feelings to develop. So she can still love me, and she does.
Or maybe I'm nuts, and y'all are going to get a chance to say "I told you so!" any day now.
One of the bad things about being weird is that it's not always easy to learn from other people's experience... you have to test it against your own experience before you can be sure it applies. But so far I'm still happy with her and she's still happy with me, and she just might get to chow down on all the yummy cake she can handle.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
