I think separation is a crucial part of getting to the point where you can find that inner peace again. And without that, it seems to me that there is little possibility of restoring the relationship one day.
..and this is exactly what John Gray says in his book...that the hope for reconciliation for many is a form of denial..that hanging on keeps you from having to face the pain of divorce or separation...that, if there truly IS any hope for reconciliation, it usually does not occur until complete forgiveness and termination of the R/M occurs and one starts from the beginning...
ADD: Separation is not a choice for me here in the state of NY. The S with the bigger pockets has to pay for EVERYTHING during the sep..different from D...and..according to my L, after 12 months, they can argue, foot drag, etc and these are the 'D's that drag on for years and years at the cost of the H. She actually made a separate phone call last fall fearing that this would happen to me and urged me to file (not Divorce) first.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
