Status 2 - W friendlier but still very distant

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Kalni, Lan:

BUT, if in your heart you are sensing there might me something different going on, that there could be a change of heart of any kind that might mean you have a very very slight

W has decidedly "cooled off"; the anger was used to justify the D in her mind. I wasn't sure the "cooling-off" was: (1) a result of my DBing or (2) W reaching a place where she's at peace with the D. My radar has been out for a while to pick up on this or any change of heart.

Tho' I learned not to react to her BS I think the cooling off is more due to the later reason. To be sure I allowed a long time friend (women) who filed D 10 years ago and reconciled 1.5 years later before the D was final. She contacted W by getting her phone# off the internet and offered to "help" in any way she could given her own experience. But my friend also did not sense ANY change of heart so the "cooling off" must indeed be more due to W being at peace with D. Since W mixes only with the pro-D cult (> 50% of the US population) this was bound to happen.

In your shoes (getting there soon) I wouldn't sign anything before a final talk with her.

I got a draft settlement a couple of days ago from my lawyer and actually read it last night. I have to say I don't like it for 2 reasons: (1) its forcing my hand (2) it gives W quite a bit more money than she legitimately should get. If I sign W wins and saving the M is out the window; if I don't it probably goes to court, W will be put to shame for her dishonesty and both loose money. But I will not sign until I've thought about it for a few more days; maybe talk with her (what do I say?); maybe suggest mediation as Kerry did (could be risky); maybe find a way to buy more time tho' all friends/family advise to get over with it and move on (nothing new).

I am here for you.

Thanks Kalni I'm not in a good place right now unfortunately. I hope you don't end up in my shoes (I want your family intact with you and H happy together) but I appreciate any support as it feels so lonely where I am.