FIB sends signals/sentiments that he isn't really sure. May he really doesn't want to give up and feels like he has to.
Not to be rude or disrespectful here, but.....DO YA THINK???
This is the part of this site that tends to get me worked up, especially since I AM now divorced and have moved on to have a new life of my own.
If you propose that you stand forever....or that EVERY marriage can be saved no matter what damage has been done or no matter how little interest one spouse shows....then it seems those who say they are done are looked on negatively. Some abandon you, at precisely the time you could use the support the most. Others pop in and do their best to convince you that there is still hope, even in the face of overwhelming fact.
And yes, 11th hour miracles are possible....not very darned likely, but very little is impossible.
So you get the message from FIB's posts that he wishes this didn't have to happen? You think? Good lord, anyone who has followed FIB's thread and thinks he is HAPPY about his marriage dying is clearly not reading closely enough.
Here's a surprise alert. Even those of us who support his current decision, even if we are already divorced, are NOT happy about having been divorced. I never planned on being divorced. My current happiness is DESPITE the fact that I have been divorced.
No, FIB is NOT happy about being divorced. He's NOT happy that his kids will be children of divorce. He's NOT happy that the woman he loves and pledged his faithfulness to has abandoned him and shows no willingness to fix what has been broken.
Don't confuse his longing for things to be right with doubt about his current path. Simply understand it to be a sad resignation at the reality that his wife has created.
Even now, if she could only show that she had the desire to make things right, to recover what was lost, if she could show any inclination whatsoever to acknowledge that she had caused near fatal damage to their family, even then he would probably listen and watch. Which is far more than most people would do.
FIB has stated his position. Only those who refuse to accept his decision as reasonable and appropriate given what he has been through persist in suggesting that he's waffling.
Now, how about we support this man who we all know is a fine man of integrity who has done everything possible to repair things between he and his wife.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
