I think I feel smothered

[WAS32]

I really wish I didn't think about the OW so much. So many little things make me think about her and my H together. I am having a hard time trusting anything he says and does. I don't think he talks to her anymore but I feel like he is always comparing me to her. I feel so insacure about everything these last few days. It doesn't matter what he says I am analizing it. I don't know how to stop this. he is doing things right for the most part but I am not feeling the same for him that he says he feels for me. He did tell me that the A did not last for very long but any A is too much for me I guess. I just don't like being angry so often. I really hope this goes away. It's our anniversary on Thursday and I don't even want acknowledge it. As far as I am concerned we have not been M for a full 5 years yet. he was gone and not committed to our M for that time. I just can't bring myself to do anything for it. Maybe that is wrong, but it is how I feel right now.