Please help me!! My wife wants out!

[steve477]

Thanks Jen, had a down day today, I was tired and some of what she said bothered me. I had done the vacuuming, using our new vacuum cleaner, I commented to her how good it was and she said that I should take it when we separate and she will have the other one.
Later she said she could see my face was not happy, I told her that I would be ok, just tired, but she pushed for more. I told her that unfortunatly she cant help me with my problem as she is not in a position to say the things that would cheer me up. She played dumba nd asked for an explanation... and then we got into a R talk.
I mentioned about finding her valentines card for him, well she got one today from someone else, a friend. She asked me if I minded the card, I told her I didnt mind that one. She said her and the OM probably wont send cards (LIE, I saw it!). I told her that anyway I didnt care what she did about that, but she said they probably wont. So the devil in me had to ask...`so you havent bought him a card then?`.. `no` she said. Oh dear. I saw a message in her phone (one of many) her message to him.. `thank you very much, I will wear them` who knows what he got her, earrings? Lingerie(proably not that as I do most of the washing, and I would find that).
Anyway it doesnt matter, can change it, so not going to worry about it.
Anyway in the R talk, we ran over the same old things, she has decided to spearate, cant change that... she likes the OM more than me...blah blah blah. She said that because i had found out about her sex with OM it was somehow `real` now and she couldnt ignore that. If I hadnt found out she could have worked on the M without feeling guilty or bad or whatever.
Had a baby step at the end though. I told her that the only thing I have ever asked of her in this is to keep an open mind.. she said she is trying but I make it difficult sometimes. So less pressure from me and who knows...
I know this may (will) take a long time, I just need to staert acting that way.
Jen, it sounds like your separation was good for you guys, I cant help but think it might be what we need. If only we didnt have a baby on the way to complicate this, I could easier let her leave me if she wasnt carrying my child.
I know this is a point for later, but I really dont want to OM to ever see the baby, because of the fact that he will look at it to see if it looks like him.

Cheers

Steve