H and I have been together for 11 years, married for 6. We have a 2.5 year old and have (had, I guess) been trying for baby #2 for 2 years! We've been having some issues, agruing a lot and I haven't been doing a very good job at cleaning the house (I admit, its messy and cluttered).
This past Friday we got into an agrument, which actually led to a discussion! We have not discussed our issues in so long (other than fighting about them). We talked for 4 hours, in those 4 hours so much information came out. It was mainly him telling me his issues as I don't have too many with him. I just get defensive (which leads to fighting).
In this conversation at the start of it he questioned if he still loved me, or was in-love with me (says he'll always love me). But he said he had some feelings for someone at work! He said he doesn't know what to do other than get a new job (which isn't really practical right now). He was clearly upset and said he felt so quilty about it. He said she doesn't know and that it is nothing more than he is excited to go to work to see this person. I don't think it is anything more than this for a few reasons 1- he doesn't come home later than usual 2- he is in a management postition and I am not sure he'd risk it.
He says he's only been with her in groups, etc.... We pretty much hashed out everything this past weekend and when Monday came (now its Tuesday) I really started going crazy. Wondering what's going on, does he still feel the same about her even after our talk? What if his feelings get stronger?
To add to all this, he is going away on Business in 3 weeks with 4 other people in his department, and guess who one of the people are! Yup, "her." I know her name and now I keep rethinking all the times he's ever mentioned her (I've never met her). When they are away they do things as groups and the first night they are going out to bars (he's not much of a drinker) and the last time they did this they were out til 1am. They will do dinners together etc..... I am going crazy! I am so afraid he will come home from this trip only to discover he didn't miss me and had fun with "her" and others and change his mind about working on our issues and staying together.
When I brought up concerns with him he was insulted that I didn't trust him because he's never done anythign to betry that trust.
He is the one who brought this to my attention, I never suspected anything like this. If I am going crazy like this now, how am I going to feel when he is away? I have been crying so much since our "talk." I just had no idea things were so bad for him in our marriage.
