I feel like I'm spinning out of control

[KPK]

Thanks BND. I've totally owned my issues that have gotten us here (mainly sex drive issues, which he didn't mention were that bad until he decided he may have to leave), and offered to try to change things, but he says he just isn't attracted to me anymore, doesn't think he's in love with me anymore. We are still friends, basically it's what we've been for the last several months. There have been some contentious times, but overall ok. He's being very generous. The issues are a) he takes no responsibility at all for what's going on or where our marriage has ended up (it's all my fault), no big change there, b) I don't want to be just friends, but I'm afraid if I keep giving him the level of friendship he currently has and wants, he'll get what he's thinking about- a good friend in me, a divorce, and the ability to just do what he wants to do. I want him to miss me when he leaves- if I keep acting like his good friend, how can that happen? and c) my completely unpredictable emotions, which I have to get a handle on. Right now we're in the process of drafting a trial separation agreement (how much he pays, who gets the kids and when, etc...) so it's definitely rollercoaster time for me. Right now, the way he wants visitation, I'll be seeing him at least 4 days a week, and on some days 6. Great for the kids, which are my primary concern, but bad for me, and for him learning how to miss me.

Ugh.