Beginning again like a newbie

[ACJ]

Naej,

I think you misunderstood me. You are right Ellie didn't say that, I did. This is how I feel. This is what I am struggling with. If I could believe the opposite I'm sure this ride wouldn't be so scary.

H and I do still have a very long way to go.

I had that conversation with my S15 to find out if I had missed something. I wanted to know if my perception of what I think I know about my children was correct. It was. My children don't feel the way H says they do. I needed to know this before I could make a change. I had to know what it is I need to change. I now know that my intuition as far as my children are concerned does not need changing, it is alright as it is.

Now I can start to change all the things that do need changing. I know what they are.

The last contact with H was just that. I do not intend to have any further communication with him unless he instigates it or unless he is here in my house. I will not be rude, I'm just not going to pursue anymore. I hadn't seen it as that but now I do.