How Many Days to Go?

[RedHeadWife]

Well, here I am finally at a turning point I suppose. Went for in-patient rehab for being hooked on pain meds for a little over a week; then I had another week or so of partial - I went there during the day, but came home at night.

Obviously, rough calling H over in Korea to tell him what was going on. First that his W was an addict and 2nd that she had actually checked herself into rehab. Of course, he was pissed at first; had to have time to process all of this b/c truly no one knew I had a problem - it was not causing any "problems" in my life. I also think later on down the road, H may even have been a bit pissed @ himself b/c maybe he DID see *something* but was not sure what and did not choose to investigate further.

I feel kind of "uneasy" about H and me now for some reason. We haven't seemed to have as much time on the phone as we did before he came home in December, etc. For now, I'm going to continue to focus on making sure I continue to get better and stay better and see what happens on the M front. I have to finally worry about ME first for a change.

The boys have been fine. My parents have been here for them and all they knew was that mommy needed to go to the hospital and couldn't have visitors. They are clueless as to drugs, etc., and since I've had 2 babies since the oldest was born and recently the hysterectomy, mommy being in the hospital didn't seem to bother them much.

I think H and I are still going to be ok, but I'm all of a sudden not as sure as I was before, but I'm not going to dwell on it. Until he gets home and we can try to get back to "normal," whatever "normal" is, I'm just going to go w/ the flow.