Hmmmm, lots of words in there! I think the most important ones were that he is not sure. So, you are not too late! So, now that that is done, I would stay away from any more letters or discussions on the topic for a good long time!
For now, you should concentrate on you. I know there are conflicting interests, but I think some GAL activities would be really good. You need to rebuild your own identity. My personal opinion is that many of us here have marriage trouble because we lose our identities in becoming a couple. Instead of two people supporting easch other we become two weaker people "needing" each other to function. I think that the biggest benefit of GAL is to break that dependency. Then you can be confident and attractive as you, and you will appear as a woman that your H would want as a wife. I don't know that I've ever seen it put that way, but that's the way it feels to me. I think both of your letters show symptoms of that, too.
