Your sitch is practically identical to mine. Married in '97, 2 boys aged 8 & 4. Had the 'speech' in Sept 05. EA with a work colleague had begun by then. H left in April 06.
Always maintained he loved me and we continued to have a sexual relationship up until Dec 06. We did carry on doing things as a family and a couple of dates together. He was very mixed up. Missed his kids and has really developed a fantastic relationship with them since he left, that is maybe the only good thing that has come out of this nightmare.
We sold the family home in Dec/Jan 07 and I moved into my current home (owned solely by me). Things changed then. His relationship with the OW developed into a sexual one in Spring 07 and I found out about it in Sept 07. Began divorce proceedings and he talked about R, but it was all talk, no action. I too had been dating on & off but no-one serious.
Christmas, he was a wreck and asked again and again to try at a R, so i finished with the guy I was seeing but my H couldn't end it with the OW - god knows what hold she has over him, or maybe he loves her but just can't admit it. I'd put the divorce on hold, but started it up again a couple of weeks ago.
He has till Friday to respond and pay some money towards court costs. I don't know what he plans to do.
I just don't know what he's done. Our marriage was never that bad for it to end this way. We still love each other and he, like your H misses the family thing.
I would have him back and try again but I'm no longer begging or pleading with him. I would work at our M, with all the problems I know we would face because I believe in marriage, family and commitment. My timeline is running out. He sent me a text at the weekend saying 'I have always been standing in your doorway', but that's no use to me, he needs to come in and put his arms around me.
What will be will be, after 2 years and 6 months I'm all cried out....good luck
