What the he!! is happening now?

[bright 2 morro]

Try,
Thank you for clarifying what you were trying to say. I love my H very much. I am not sure I will ever stop loving him. I have moved way beyond him in this RAT race. I guess I am not sure he will ever be able to understand what he is doing. I also know that in order for me to do what I need to do for me and the kids I need to move on.

Because I do feel the way I do about him I agonize over hurting him in my decision making. I know that he is just threatening me and most of the MLCers eventually like that we stand up for ourselves. I pretty much told him yesterday that his threats were not going to work for me anymore because I do not care if he comes back or not. So using that as a threat is not going to work.


Celestial,
Thank you for the reminder.

Yes, play it through and see what happens. His sudden change is his MLC mind. His anger and meanness is at himself for being such a jerk, not at you. It helps to remember that.

I do know this and remind myself every day of this. But I am also getting to the point where I am begining to think that he will never see the light and then I would be the fool for believing in him and loving him for no reason what so ever. I am really begining to think that he does not ever plan on coming back. And maybe this is where I need to be in order to protect myself. Patience I have but tolerance is a completely different thing. I am better than all of this and did not deserve any of this.

Because I know what I know about MLC and what he is going through I was able to forgive him for all he has done up to this point. Because I took the time to research and figure it out I can truly understand him and feel sorry for him. But in the end this is all his doing. And he is using threats to control me. Threats about not coming back or fighting me in court. He has to know that I do not care and that the threats are not going to work with me anymore.

I have done so much thinking over the weekend. I have gotten mad at him in my head. Mad because in order for me to put me first I need to do things that will upset him and make him angry. I am so not that person. Never have been and do not want to be that type of person. But I am not sure i can live with what he is proposing for child support. And I am pretty sure that even if I come back with something in the middle then he is going to be mad at me again. If I agree to this there will just be something else he will try to force me into. There is no way I will be able to win on anything.

B2M