I am saying this, because sometimes being "Nice" to your W is a normal route men go, thinking it will change the W. Usually it won't change much. I see similar activities in your post that other "Nice Guys" do, thinking it will change the W's attitude.
We were in marriage counseling for a year and a half but it seemed to be of little value. Was someone holding back during the sessions or do you consider the MC to be ineffective. I would think 1.5 years of c should have changed a few things if the C and you two were really working on real issues.
From what I know, MC’ing doesn't always talk about ways to change, but becomes a complaint session.
My personal opinion, not having sex with a spouse that wants to ML is very close to betrayal. Like I said, that is my view point.
Other men have said their W would never cheat but that myth has been broken many times. I am not saying it is true in your case. Just giving you part of the actual history of this forum from the last 3+ years that I have posted here and on other forums.
if the topic of sex came up in marriage counseling, my wife immediately shut down and stopped talking. I say foul and so should have your MC. Your W is entitled to her opinion but not talking about the issue is passive aggressive or something like that.
Should I initiate being affectionate with her once again or should I just tell her I am calling it quits and moving on with a life without her. It is your M. I can't tell you to stay or go. I/the forum can suggest things to try or say or what they did.
Does your W want to stay M, and I mean M that involves sex, affection, and all of that married stuff? If she believes the Bible, ask her where no sex for 3 years is written. Maybe you shouldn’t ask that question because most no-sex drive spouses see that as an attack on their personality.
Would she post on this forum? I know of several H/W posters that have greatly improved their M. It works a lot better if both people are playing by the same playbook. One spouse here and the other not, is like playing a game where each person decides what rules/norms apply and when. Not my version of how to make progress.
So now I am supposed to feel bad because I have worked hard all my life and now make a good living financially? So, what does she object to? You worked too many hours? You charged too much? You sell/work/immoral/what ever defective products?
I love my wife but I am not really sure what happened to her. Esquire, you can mostly only work on yourself. If she sees something that she likes and wants to be a part of, she will have to do her work.
Possibly, if she sees you moving on w/o her she will do her work. More than one spouse said s/he was leaving her/his spouse before the reluctant spouse got off their center of the universe chair and did something to keep the M in tact.
Different things work or not work for different couples.
