Making progress...slowly

[Michael Mc C]

H4C, good to hear you sounding so positive. I'm thinking that the "scared her off" theory was partially correct. Seems you backed off and she came out of hiding again. I'm very happy for you (job, things turning around, etc.)

I think having these doubts is natural. You've been fighting for the chance to get the M back on track, that was your focus. Now that she is out of the fog you can take a step back and really start to process the damage that has been done. I imagine that this is where things can really get difficult as you both try to come to terms with everything that has happened.

I can't wait for the day that you tell us that OM has finally left. Having him around is still a distraction, IMO. At least it would be for me.

Enjoy the weekend together!!

[Yoyowife]

H4C,
You sound great! I'm glad things are going so for well for you!

Hugs,

[JoieDeVivre]

Hurtin,
Where are you? Are things still progressing slowly? Did OM leave??

Hope you're doing well.

Joie

[Hurtin4certain]

Hi Joie,

Things are rough again. W and I were getting along and she was really pursuing but then we got into a tiff about money (tax refund). We havent spoken in about a week so I texted her (anti-DB I know) "Im going to assume you are back with OM". She never responded.

Before our argument she told me she gave him 2 week deadline as her sister was moving in with her. I have a feeling sister will move in and take OM's room which will mean he will be sleeping in W's bed again.

Im really going back and forth, one minute I miss her and the next minute I think she's a wh*re and that OM can have her.

Still on the roller coaster.

[JoieDeVivre]

Hurtin,
I'm really sorry to hear that. Just when you thought the rough part of the ride was pretty much over, you're back on it. That sucks. But maybe it was best for it to happen before she moved back in, you know? Either way, I know it's hard for you.

Joie

[Hurtin4certain]

Update... so it seems I am officially back on the roller coaster. W was really pursuing me, kicking OM out etc. We had a few discussions about us that started to get heated. THen out of the blue she stopped texting me, calling etc.

THis is exactly what happened when she first got with OM.

We havent spoken in 2 weeks now, OM was supposed to move out today but I have yet to hear anything confirming that. D told me today that OM bought W a big teddy bear for Valentines. That pretty much confirms they are back on in my eyes.

I dont know what to do... she was REALLY pursuing me 2 weeks ago, telling me how much she loved me, telling me Im sexy etc. Now its back to absolutely nothing.

Please tell me this is all part of the process...

[Yoyowife]

H4C,
I'm sorry to hear you are on the rollercoaster again. I've ridden it way too many times. We have attempted reconciliation so many times and then my hopes were dashed. I've come to realize while the OP is still within their reach, headway will not be made. It's like an addiction that they seem to be kicking and then all of sudden they give into their cravings again. All we can do at this point is to carry on the best we can with our lives and watch out for ourselves as well as our children. Remember lovingly detach...

Stay strong and continue to do what you have been doing, which means you aren't pursuing. Use your instincts. You have done well with them.

[Hurtin4certain]

So my D confirmed that the PA is still on with OM and W, in fact, it may have never ended.

This feels exactly how it felt when I first found out about OM in November. Im sooo hurt, again.

2 weeks ago my W was blowing my phone up with text messages "Im going to fix this" "I want my family back" "I love you and want you back" "I feel so lost without you" "Cant stop thinking about you".

Now we havent spoken in 2 weeks and she doesnt even try to talk to me, she communicates to me through my mom (I actually prefer this as talking to her at this point is too painful).

I dont understand and Im so hurt all over again. My petition for D was dismissed 2 weeks ago (I thought we were getting back together) and now this.

Someone please provide some insight, Im dying.

[fightingirish]

Hurtin,

I'm so sorry you are back to a bad place. She is really doing a number on you.

Im not expert, but I would just keep my distance, and let things cool down. Don't force anything, just continue galing, concentrate on you and Your D.

I know I wasn't much help, but I am very sorry for your pain.

[Hurtin4certain]

Thanks Tired..

I guess I dont understand how she can go back and forth like that. Is this all a part of the process? Is it common for WAWs to go back and forth like that?

This sucks and Im contemplating throwing in the towel and announcing the OM the victor.

H4C