Karen, Choc is right, it's not easy to suggest what to do.
It's great that you're seeing an IC. Definitely talk to her at your next session. You know, your H knows you don't like him to text OW around you, so why was it ok with him to take a weekend trip with her? He had to know that would NOT be ok. And, he threw it at you pretty much at the last minute. Dirty pool....
If it were me I'd be telling my H -- not again - not while you're in this house! Or if he did, to pack his crap. But I understand you're avoiding that. I didn't want that either. I felt like no matter what happened, it was better to have my H at home. So, I, too, put up with a lot.
If it makes you feel better, I know my H spent an overnight or two with OW after I found out about the A. But he lied to me about it so I wouldn't know. If he had told me outright I would have said, pack enough to last you for a long time!
The first time he did it I found out by snooping. The second time, OW emailed me in an angry frenzy. But by that time, the A was dying out. If it was still going on full force, I would have asked him to leave. But it would have been the hardest thing I'd ever done. So, I understand why you don't want to do that.
I liked Choc's point about setting boundaries. He will get away with what he can. And, I think if he really wanted to leave, he would be gone by now so think about that before you worry about chasing him away!
