First, welcome aboard! It is awful that you have to be here, but you will find a lot of good people here!
I think that as long as the interactions you are having are positive, or at least not negative, there isn't any reason to stop them. Detaching emotionally doesn't have to mean detaching physically, and I don't think you are anywhere near needing to pull out the LRT. On the other hand, a little bit of alone time will probably be good for both of you, so you should work on GAL stuff. But I don't think aloof is what you are aiming for... I think you just want it to be clear that he isn't the center of everything you do, and that what you do when you are not together isn't his problem. Even if it is for just a few hours now and then, you do something for you. Stay away from R talks, if he starts one, do your best to change the subject, to avoid going into that dance! Don't pursue, meaning don't initiate contact, don't suggest things to do together, and obviously don't beg and plead. That doesn't mean you can't spend time together, and together with the kids, just be careful how you do it.
I realy don't think you are too late. Obviously, no one knows the outcome, but there have been worse situations with good outcomes. The other thing that you will find here over time, is that by GAL and focusing on yourself, you will be a better you, and will be able to hold your head high, no matter what the outcome.
I wish you luck! The weekends are often a bit slow around here, but I am sure you will find lots of encouragement in the next few days!
