plus it isn't so much about her. because for the most part she has little or no self esteem and never has. she doesn't do things for herself but rather does what she thinks other people would want her to do. she constantly monitors what others think of her and has to always keep up the facade that she is this ultra strong woman with no weaknesses or vulnerabilities.
Trouble is, she knows that I see right through that crap. I know the real her and I even (surprisingly)got to see that yet again on Tues night when she served me. she was all emotional and was going through kleenex like it was going out of style. She may be able to fool others, maybe even herself at times but not me.
I know she has a soft side to her, but because all the trust she had in me was blown over a yr ago, I live with the reality that she may never let me see that feminine, girly soft side of her again.
