Waterski, An A is an addiction. There are those who decide to end an addiction and they're done -- it's a matter of resolve and conviction. Then there are those who waiver back and forth. Their addiction has a strong hold on them or their resolve is not great so they have a tough time beating it.
It's hard to say what will happen with your wife. But don't be surprised if you find out they do contact each other again. The question about what to do about it is up to you.
The book chocolateeyes recommends is very good. I've read it, too. It tells you to hang in there. That the fantasy of the A will end...
My philosophy is to be the person they want to be with. Be patient. It's also important to focus on yourself.
