Thanks, all. Where do I start? OK, here goes. The insanity continues. D17 graduated from high school, but still remains in the therapeutic portion of the school. She is on a home visit until Sunday, when she returns. She has applied to colleges, has remained sober and hopes to become a teacher. All good stuff. 9K a month, but she needed to be removed or she would die, W. would kill her or she would kill W.
D17 is going to Thailand in two weeks. I got it. I knew about it. Then she springs it on me: “I may be going to Vietnam as part of a service organization. It will cost about 5K”. I didn’t know about that. I love my D, but does W. really have to spend 5K more to send her to Vietnam? WTH? Over. What is she thinking will happen when she deploys the chute here? I have no issue putting away money at this point. Perhaps even upping it. What’s next, a Lexus?
NH: You’re right. I gave W. huge leeway. She took good care of me and the kids and the house and bills, but then the anger took over. I call it “Undifferentiated anger”. It was directed at everything AND nothing. She was a very giving person, and I was not as emotive as she needed. Also, I did take her on head-to-head a number of times. I always lost and with each time, her grudge grew, being an “injustice collector”. Do you know that in 22 years, she never said “I’m sorry” once….not one time. I’ve often heard about how great “makeup sex” was from my friends. “What’s that?” Although she claimed to be very emotive, it was often bad emotion. I built up resentment too. I just think how great it would have been for her to say ONE TIME: “This is stupid. What are we arguing about? I’m really sorry” That would have melted me. I am incapable of holding grudges. 800 pound leg presses for reps. not bad for a 52 year old guy. Hit the treadmill today, and ran like my life depended on it. Exercise is such a great thing!
Imperfections that other spouses find endearing, she just found aggravating beyond belief. Nothing big either.
AG: I’ve got to ask: An attorney and an engineer? What happened? I love smart women, but I guess relationships are often very difficult, no matter how smart one is. Thanks for your input. I’m not a quitter. On anything. Never have been. I’m a big believer in commitment. Think of where we’d be if the rest of my military officer brethren, “Supported and defended the Constitution against all enemies foreign and domestic IF I HAPPEN TO BE EMOTIONALLY FULFILLED BY THE JOB OR IF I AGREE WITH THE CONFLICT” I was so confused when we visited the last MC who said to me: “Maybe you just don’t get each other” What? I never wanted to leave, and I still don’t. I may not get to vote in this election, however. Here’s a question: WHY DO MOST (not all, but most) GUYS MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE THAT THEY PAID FOR, WHEN THEIR W. WANTS OUT, AND THEY DON’T? Just a generalization, but a true one. Jeez do I have Attention Deficit disorder this evening? The "Ritalin Ranger!"
I’ve never wanted to look at “greener grass”, but I may have to find a new lawn, because it may be out of my control. I don't beleive any relatioship is easy, but I may not have a choice.
Hill: Waterproof iPod! Get out your “Run to Cadence with the Navy Seals” CD! I hate to run, but I put on that “Run to Cadence with the Rangers” CD, and I can go all day!
