She's ready to move on

[Michael Mc C]

Agree completely that Retro will be beneficial to us and to the family as a whole, regardless of how things pan out. I'm also putting a lot of thought into Mom's comments about getting things moving here. I have heard the same recommendation from many people. I have begun detaching more which seems to be a little easier now that I see things from Mom's perspective (thanks Mom of 2 Cherubs!)

Something interesting over the past 2 nights... W and I are slowly building some tension it seems. This is the "good" kind of tension and it builds just after going to bed. Don't want to get into too many details but there is a lot of NON-sexual contact, although I would still consider it intimate. Hell, at this point a handshake from her seems intimate!

I know my wife pretty well so I have been fairly certain that she has been aware of this contact (based on things like her seeking my feet when I move them, her making herself more "available" by turning towards me after I pull away from her and, the big one, her increased heart rate and breathing once I put my arm around her or lay my hand on her side/hip/arm.

I wasn't 100% sure that she had been awake during this until this morning (this feels so much like a test).

Me: You and the dog kept me up last night.
Her: It was the dog. I didn't do anything.
Me: You were sleeping, how do you know if you did anything or not?
Her: I wasn't sleeping. You kept me up all night AGAIN.
Me: Well, stop throwing your body at me and let me sleep!
Her: <very sly grin...> I'm not throwing anything. You keep trying to cuddle.
Me: No way.
Her: You're probably sleeping when you do it.
Me: We should stop talking about this or we'll ruin the fun for tonight.
Her: <another sly grin, some blushing and she left my office>

Anyway, both nights I have been very careful not to cross any lines, not to make a big deal out of it and not to make myself too accomodating (mostly because I could be wrong...) I told her a while ago that she would need to pursue me if anything happened to change. She definitely seems to be pursuing something.

It is a delicate balance though. I don't want to seem overly eager but I also don't want to appear uninterested or unaffected. My m.o. at this point is to reciprocate and pull away. I have no clue where this is really going to lead but I can honestly say that getting only 3 hours of sleep these past 2 nights has been well worth it. God, just the quickening of her pulse and the speed and depth of her breathing have been worth it!

I'd better stop thinking about this now...