Well, it's been a while since I've posted. I had a talk with H on 1/27/08 about kids/property/etc. However, I did apologize to him for not putting him first, not appreciating him, and for neglecting him. I told him that I hoped he could forgive me. He said he could. I truly needed to do this for my own healing.
Then I messed up on DBing. I asked him why we couldn't be the "next time" (he said he was going to do things differently the next time) and work on things. That if he really looked at things he'd see that he hadn't given US a fair chance and that I'd appreciate it if he'd give us a fair, unclouded chance. I also told him that we had a communication problem and that we need to work on it so we could at least be friends for our S's sake. He got defensive and talked about how he could start the D proceedings. He also said that he was the one having to do without. That I had all the comforts, the pool, the kids had their rooms & their home. I told him he could come home any time he wanted. I also asked him if he was living with the OW and he said Yes, off and on. Otherwords, on weekends when her kids aren't there.
OK, I have obtained a copy of OW D papers. Her H filed for D back in 9/06. 1 yr after my H and OW started their PA. I know I shouldn't and I probably won't but I'd love to talk to OW's ExH. I want to ask him if he knew of their A (their D papers stipulate no non-family members of the opposite sex overnight visits while the minor children are present - which makes me think he did), when he left her, where she lives, etc. I know that the answers won't do anything but take care of my curiosity.
Also, OW has a common name for this area. I found a bankruptcy and a small claims judgment against her name. I would like to know if it's her. H says that all I care about is the money and I see OW as a gold digger.
H came to an event on 2/5/08 where I was with our friends and S's. He received several call/text. He went behind a big electrical box at a bldg. and made a phone call (he thought no one saw him but we did) and announced to me and S15 not 15 minutes later that he had to head out. He and I got along well that morning.
Yesterday, I took off 1/2 from work to go my friends son's national signing party for him and went to work out afterwards. When I got home H was there talking to S15. I told them both hello. H asked me if I'd gone to work. I said yes. Then he asked if I'd gone to work dressed like THAT?! I said no that I had a function that I went to and I'd just came back from working out. He was using a very ugly tone with me. Then he said he'd "cleaned" the pool. He dumped the leaves from the skimmers on the side of the pool instead of in the trash or even in the yard. He said what does it matter? You have all these leaves under the porch. I explained that they were from the bad storm that had blown through the night before. Why do they have to act like children!! I swear I'm dealing with 3 teenage boys!
I have had a lot of people tell that they see me improving daily. They can tell when they talk to me that I am sounding more happy and more like my old self. I believe I am getting stronger. I went to a wedding Sat. night and called my friend on the way and told her that I thought I actually looked hot. She was so happy for me. On a funny note, I didn't come home until 3 am after the wedding. My S19 gave me the 3rd degree the next morning. Who were you with, what time did you get home (he got home before me!), etc. I avoided most questions with my own questions but I thought it was cute that he was doing the "Dad" job on me. His girlfriend said that S19 thought that I'd had a date and that I wasn't supposed to be doing that and he didn't even get to meet the guy. I told her there was no date just out with a couple that I work with. Anyway, I thought it was cute how he acted.
