W not angry any more and wants to work on the M

[Lanzo]

Hi CL

The faling asleep is by no means our major problem, but it's just a trigger point I recognised that used to make me withdraw from W and find other thing to so other than spend time with her. In recognising this trigger point I want to see how to handle things better and not make the same mistakes of the past.

W big thing is quality time and family time, and it is she who instigates this spending time together and this builds up my expectations that we will have nice evenings together. So when she falls asleep I think, oh, I won't bother next time. Even at times when we weren't getting on W would want me to be around her.

As for the "Early nights", well , W used to withhold sex for so long and it would be her that would suggest we clear the decks get D6 off to bed and then we can spend time together. So as you could see my expectations would be sky high, but as soon as she felt my body heat in the bed she was off sleeping. So yes I used to take it personally, and it would hurt even more when she would say in the morning "last night I really wanted you, but I couldn't stay awake" and that would be that window of opportunity gone for another few weeks (even months).

On the plus side W has just suggested we spend time together in the kitchen at the weekend, this was something we used to do when we were reconciling 2 years ago but I think I withdrew from that cos we were getting no where in the bedroom and I probably found something else to do on my own.


Lan