How many times have I heard men on here basically say "I can't leave because she will take the kids." That is F-ed up. As a mother, I would never want to take their father away from them...especialy for spite. And if you are with a woman now that would truly do that to you in a D (if she even could, but that's another issue), than you have bigger problems than a SSM.
LFL
Let's look at it from my wife's perspective. She is a SAHM, who has told me on numerous occasions that the kids are her life. So, if I were to initiate a divorce and tried to get joint custody with 50% visitation, my wife would perceive me as trying to take the kids away from her.
I don't think she would fight me out of spite. She would fight me on the basis (and genuine belief) that the children would be better off with her the majority of the time. And since she has been a SAHM and has had a much stronger connection to the children, she could probably make an argument stick for a lopsided visitation schedule in her favor.
SM
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." Henry David Thoreau
