I wrote this (amongst others) when I was trying to figure out why things went tits up in my marriage...
The Trouble With Women And Maps.
"Turn left", you told me, and I probably turned right. "U-turn here!" So I went straight on at the lights. At the roundabout, you wanted me to go all the way round. But I likely swore, and yelled that the map was upside down.
"About two miles ahead, there'll be a T-junction". I didn't hear you clearly. I must have missed that instruction. "We're coming up to dual carriageway now", you said. But that one, too, just drifted right over my head.
One time you informed me, "there's a crossroads along here". But all that did was confuse the h*ll out of me. Soon after, you told me to watch my speed on this road. It just sounded to me like you were speaking in code.
It's clear to me now that you were giving me directions. To you and your heart. But I just couldn't follow them. All I did was drive in circles, around and around. (And I apologise for yelling that the map was upside down.)
But I'm listening now. I'm alert, lucid, and awake. I know when to speed up. I know when to brake. I know when to turn left. When to turn right. And now I'm sure I can find my way to your heart without that map (and at night).
