I'm not suggesting that you try to learn to like Cac's smoking. It is very bad for him physically and certainly it is painful to know that he is hurting his health. My ex-H is a smoker, current H is not. I far prefer not having to worry about H's health in that way, not paying for cigarettes out of the family budget and not dealing with smoker's breath etc.... I'm just suggesting that under the right conditions something that has negative associations can be associated with some positives even if the objective reality is negative. My Grandfather quit smoking at some point years before he died and in those years the association was so strong that when I would hug him I still could almost smell that smell. That being said, I am thrilled beyond belief that there is no smoking in restaraunts where I live etc... I know it seems preposterous but in sexuality we often tune out distractions and tune in on other things. For example, we tune out a partners fat rolls and tune in the softness of the skin. Is Cac willing to try to give up smoking? Is this about something else about smoking other than the smell?? These are rhetorical questions. I don't expect an answer but your answer to me suggests that the smell is the least of the issue.
