I am in a similar position, our S16 refuses point blank to associate with H, our son has principles, his dad is not a good role model in sons eyes. As far as son is concerned until his dad stops telling lies and decides to come clean with info then H can just stay away.
Son is grounded, he isn't going budge. A few months ago I wrote to H and offered a route to help him see s16, Son has said that he doesn't want to meet H outside of the family home, that he wants H to visit him at home so that they can sit and talk. H has fabricated a reason why this cannot happen ( blamed me ) I contacted H and offered that I vacate the home so enable him to meet with son, H has refused point blank. So son and H have reached stalemate.It is like having 2 teenagers go at each other, neither backing down, I used to find this exhausting and frustrating but now I just realise that this is not my doing, that H's actions have brought this about, that it is good that son is setting boundaries because he has principles. That until H finds a way to connect with his son there would be little chance of a reconciled relationship, so I am just getting on with my life day by day, it is difficult witnessing a father loose the respect of his sons but it is his doing.
