Hairdog, when your W asked, "do you want me to stick around?" what did you say. I definitely agree that she should have stayed without being asked.
I'm sure I said something like, "No, of course you don't need to stick around." She may have even pushed, saying, "I know you don't need me to stick around. Do you want me to stick around?" Back then, when I felt it was SO important to not be a burden, I might have even said, "no...please don't stick around."
It would be different now. I imagine myself saying something like, "damn right I want you to stick around. And just so we're clear on this if I come out of this surgery without the ability to express myself: I want you to assume that I will always want you to be there. To the greatest extent possible, I want you to be the last person I see before I go under the knife, and I want you to be the first person I see when I wake up."
Hairdog, who left out the part about how he can't believe he married someone so thoughtless (or clueless) that they'd bother to ask such a question.
