What I hope to do is get her to either commit or not. And if she commits, to actually take action (which I think would have to include counseling, probably individually and together).
I disagree that that sounds controlling. I would say it is proactive. This woman has to be woken up and sometimes that includes shaking the crap outta the fence.
What I would caution you on OJ is the fact that she is probably going to be caught well off guard by you grabbing the bull by the horns and placing it in her lap. Be prepared to see and feel her process her own emotions, which you have done to a certain extent by being a part of this board. It is going to rip off the scab if you do this but I do agree that it needs to be done. It just must be done out of LOVE, not anger or bitterness. Keep that in mind.
